Well hello. The usual, it has been a long time since I have posted. Perhaps it is overindulgence in making music, perhaps it is a coping strategy or perhaps it is the first time in my life that I feel included, accepted and celebrated. Maybe that is the real pull […]
It was the final straw. I hit rock bottom. More than depression (which is bad enough) but suicidal ideation. For those 15 minutes alone, for that 10-minute call with the distress center, with letters written to my doctors, with a message sent out to kids reaching for support. It finally […]
This is the first Christmas I am not too loopy. Every year I tell my shrink I go “crazy” around Christmas time. This year she upped my meds before things got too hairy. I have stopped loving Christmas as I got caught in the rat race, of let’s show the […]
“From Longman Dictionary of Contemporary Englishwallow in self-pity/despair/defeat wallow in self-pity/despair/defeat etc to seem to enjoy being sad etc, especially because you get sympathy from other people – used to show disapproval He’d been feeling sorry for himself, wallowing in self-pity.”(1) AKA Hero to Zero as Neil puts it. Ok, […]
December 2, 2021- starting this at 12:15 am. I sense an all-nighter but if I write everything I want to, then I will be able to go to bed. I am doing good. I really want to try and focus on positive stuff, look for signs of goodness rather than […]
Tuesday, November 30, 2021- The fallout. I had two doctor appointments on Friday over the phone. I knew something had to change and I wanted to talk to my shrink and let her know what happened to me while I was taking Clonazepam. My therapist Dr feels that I likely […]
Well hi everyone. I need to write a shitty blog. As you may know, I am bipolar, Bipolar 1. And as many people have indicated for a while is that I have been manic, I wish that back right now. The doctor is worried about my irregular sleep as well […]
Saturday, July 12th It has been a long time since I have written anything I have been so busy with school and singing. School is hard, having a hard time focusing and organizing myself, but learned I can focus outside or on the bus. But the newest adventure is we […]
Cool date. Easter Sunday for us. I was more focused on preparing for my dad to come over that I forgot about my own kids. Way too old for the whole Easter egg hunt, and my daughter is still staying at her dad’s. We have nice visits and have had […]
Now March 28, I will have more to post that is current. A new beginning somehow. Still flaw, so ya, I have beat all my silly demons that were making my and Neils life difficult. I almost wondered if I was psychotic. I told the doctor I was afraid I […]
Adventures of Dit Dot 