Oh, It’s not very often that you will hear me brag. I am usually in struggle, though being in manic phase I kind of think I am great, a rock star, a poet, someone who will publish a book someday…lol, kind of goes to my head. No NO. I am humble enough?
And actually, I am not sure what makes “a big head” become a big head? Like I feel great about myself (sometimes) I think I do a decent job, but I also like to hear that I have done a good job.
My singing, for instance, Many years of karaoke and I am starting to branch off. I have always been envious of people who could do open mic and local musicians. That what I want. I think my last post was after the first time I have done open mic, well now I have done three. The first time I sang one song, second two, and I was supposed to do a third last night, but I lost confidence a bit and felt I took up enough time. Here is a pic of last night.
Again, I am not a singer, I am not a professional, not even close but I feel I have the right voice for some songs, and I try hard at songs that are not in my range. The songs I have been singing in open mic, are easy for me. WHEN IT’ S KARAOKE VERSION! Lol seriously way harder to do it with just a guitar. Luckily my guy uses lyrics too so I felt completely comfortable because I could use them as well (which I need).
A post long ago, I was manic and talking about being a rock star. Is it really that far fetched? If I can get really good on the open mic, well what If I could join this guy’s duet he has. Maybe occasional backup singer. (still delusional?)
Oh, my dear. I did tell him all about me wanting to be in a band. And a duet. And really maybe open mic is all I can do, but to me, a great big feat. He is a really nice guy. I am not sure how old he is but maybe early forties though maybe he is only thirty-five. I am not sure. But he sings really good and sing songs I know, and just has the Aura of a good person. I felt it, I said a few nice things to him about that too. So likely I am getting up and encouraged by him because he is super nice and wants to help me achieve a little dream I had. Even if I am not great.
But it is happening.
Speaking of dreams..about two years ago I ventured into beginning a journal from the day Neil and I got engages to the day we got married (we had a covid wedding). As I started writing I thought, wouldn’t it be cool if I could turn it into a book. OOOOO Maybe someday I will publish it…(I even have a title)
And actually, isn’t that happening now too?
Well, I kind of feel it. I am registered in a course at the local college, I have mentioned before I think, and I am taking the Creative Writing Certificate course. This is where my other brag comes. I have just handed in my Twenty Seven Poem Collection Digital Portfolio last week. The feedback I received floored me.
“This is an exceptional portfolio of work, which shows maturity in your application of imagery and metaphor.”
Like really? Is this happening..and wait..more?
“..good luck submitting your work. ”.
So guess what assignment is coming this week? Find publishers and write an introductory letter.
It’s gonna happen. And maybe nothing will come out of it. Or maybe something will. Just completing the opportunity, the risk of rejection. No, I won’t be done. It is courageous enough just to go that far, as is open mic. And I will be proud of that.
Oh in case you were wondering I got 18/20 for my collection. I am mightily proud of that.
You know the girl that sings in the band, with the guy from Karaoke? She said she started with an open mic…
And now you should see her. I am so proud of her, and very flatteringly she is proud of me too, and another wow factor.. ”I will have to come see you perform!” She messaged on the post on Facebook.
Like wow, she travels Canada performing.
So today is Brag Day. Find something that you have done well, find something that you want to try, and try it. And you know what? If getting up was all you could muster then at least you are getting up.
I did it and I am doing it.
Here, finally, is a poem,
For four days My brow was furrowed
Eyes full of sorrow
The energy suddenly appeared
Seeds planted and cleared
For the nighttime sun
Feeds the energy and I won.
For everything I have felt
My thoughts that were not svelte
Came and went away
On this very day
It followed me around
It didn’t make a sound
You feel it deep within your heart
Makes a perfect re-start
Not handed on a silver spoon
I conquered the dune
and the feelings I braved
Gave me a very special day
You will hear me say
I am living for today