Chapter 6
January 30th, 2020
Rebecca. She has no idea what she has done for me. She has woken my spirit. I feel it. Finally, inside.
She sent me a link to a video on YouTube; “Aura Cleansing” I am still listening to it. I don’t normally listen to music while I am writing but I found out that if I played my music through my earphones on my desk it converts it to background noise. Cool eh?
It stirred something in me quite vigorously. Aura. Chakras. Lucid Dreaming. Something I got into years ago. I was at one of my happiest (likely hypomanic) times. I felt freedom from within. My daughter sending me this link? The fact that she is into it at such a young age. Koodoos to her. I am so very very proud of her. She is a strong young lady. She has been to hell and back and wow. What an amazing young spirit.
So years ago when I had been into this I found a book called Lucid Dreaming. I can’t remember if that was the exact title and I don’t know who the author is. I couldn’t find it on Amazon either but I am pretty sure the books are relatively similar. The book I had had a whole section on Chakras and I read it, I read the whole book but I paid special attention to the section about chakras. It piqued my interest. I didn’t study it like a bible but I got a good sense of what I was doing.
This is what I know in my way of understanding. Chakras are energy points in your body. Each chakra has a zone. Each of these zones must be running smoothly like a wheel. Each chakra has implications both positive and negative depending on if they are running smoothly.
When your chakras are out of line it can dull your aura.
I just figured me out. It’s something that pills can’t fix. This is a natural fix. Nature.
There are seven chakras. All in line with your spine. I will give you brief information that I have on my chart I just ordered on Amazon.
It starts at the top of your head, but that is the seventh chakra.
The seventh chakra is called the crown chakra. Located in the center of your head, between the eyebrows.
Each chakra shows healthy or unhealthy so I will make a little list, And each chakra has a colour. I am not sure why the colours but I will be studying all this more when I get my books I just ordered and my chart. I even found these “yoga towel-mats” I bought 3. I have glass bedroom doors ( french doors) and I have curtain rods up and have curtains for when someone needs privacy. but they are mostly open. French doors are my favourite type of doors. They make the light shine right through the house. I had Neil put one in for a door to the basement at my old place and one in the laundry room on the main level. In my house now my office and my bedroom are at the back of the house with my windows facing south I believe. So I get the late morning and afternoon sun. I have to keep my doors shut because of Archie my dog. It made the whole back of the house dark. I hated it. Even worse they were the old cardboard plain brown doors (Hollow panel doors.) with the brass door handle. Like 1960’s era.
Anyways, so these yoga towels are almost big enough to use as a curtain. They are beautiful. they have the 7 colours of chakras, they are beautiful. So I decided I would buy one for the two bedrooms with french doors, and one as a throw blanket in the lounge. Yes. Beautiful. I feel it in my soul. Bring in more good vibes.
Sorry, back to the point I am a tad manic Neil says.
The Crown Chakra; 7th, violet, top of your head.
-Healthy chakras is this area shows higher consciousness and divine connection.
-Imbalanced chakras would have closed-mindedness, disconnection with spirit. Cycnicm.
The Third Eye Chakra; 6th, indigo, center of the forehead between the eyebrows.
-Healthy; it represents intuitions, foresightedness and imagination.
-Imbalanced chakras; lack of direction and lack of clarity.
The Throat Chakra; 5th, blue, center of the neck.
-Healthy; ability to communicate, clearly, effectively.
-Imbalanced; shyness, arrogance, anxiety.
The Heart Chakra; 6th Green, located in the center of your chest, yes, it represents love, self-love and relationships (healthy)
-Imbalanced; depression, difficulty in relationships and lack of self-discipline.
Solar Plexis Chakra; 3rd, yellow, located below the chest.
-Balanced; self-esteem, pleasure, personal responsibility.
-Imbalanced; low self-esteem, control issues, manipulative, misuse of power.
Sacral; 2nd, orange, below the navel.
-Balance; creative and sexual energies.
-Imbalanced; repressed creativity, sexual function, withheld intimacy and emotional isolation.
Root Chakra; first. Red, located at the base of the spine.
-Balanced represents safety, security and stability.
-Imbalance attributes to scattered energies anxiety and fear.
I am completely off balance. My aura probably isn’t that good, though I know I have the power to still shine when I am needed. I know I put all my energies into it, like for my kids. Even when I am burnt out, I find some light for them. I try.
Completely off balance. In fact, I wonder if I still remember who I am. I could go through the list, I struggle in so many of them that might show up in my writing, perhaps not. But briefly, I am having the following issues based on the chakras, Crown; I have disconnected with my spirit. Third Eye Chakra, I am strong in, Throat; I struggle communicating right now, esp verbally, I have to write emails instead and they often end up angry. The Heart; I am struggling with self-love, with self-discipline. The Solar Plexis; control issues, self-esteem again.
Sacral; creative and sexual energies are both poor.
A year ago I would have said my chakras were in line, almost. 10 Years ago, I was working on it, maybe more like 20 wow. Lol.
I actually just remembered my tattoo I got in my early thirties, an era of hippie and magic like Chakras. Anyways, I had a tattoo designed to go around my wrist. It was actually a stamp for a lower back tattoo, the tattooist made it so it fit my wrist, I know I have a pic of it somewhere….It has six of seven chakras. Crown/third eye purple, I clustered them together, Throat- blue, heart green, solar plexus- yellow, sacral-orange and I don’t have Root Chakra represented. Perhaps that is not one I had fulfilled at the time.


When my daughter sent me that link, well now I have guidance to fix what I need to make things even better for Neil and me. I wish he could do the same but just because I suggest it, he will say no. When I just messaged him a bit about it, it ends it with, “It sounds complicated.” I am not sure if many men get it, correct me if I am wrong. My ex laughed at me when I tried to explain this, the father of my daughter, who is now in my footsteps. My other ex would have walked away or told me I was nuts. One man would get it. He was all into yoga and meditation. So I don’t think many men get it or want to, not cause they are bad people, they just don’t share the same ideas. And that’s ok. I need this for me.
I have to find ways again to literally get my gears going, my chakras. This is going to be a whole new me.
Stuff meds can’t fix.
I have my work cut out.
It’s time.
I’m coming back.
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Christie F.
Welcome to my blog. I have been journal writing for years. I took a course in Creative writing and found I enjoy writing short stories and poetry. I write more when I am hypomanic or manic.
I went into Rehab for Alcohol Addictions and have been sober for fourteen years.
Shortly after I quit drinking I was diagnosed with Bipolar 2, I have since been diagnosed with Bipolar 1.
I enjoy talking about my story, for people to learn or relate. I try and have a healthy lifestyle and try to use my coping strategies. Life is just too boring without Bipolar, it is a blessing but yet sometimes a curse.
I am currently working on a book and dream of publishing one day.
I am so excited to have found Wordpress.
This is my new adventure.
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