Happy New Year fellow bloggers and visitors and followers! I hope your New Years was joyful, loved and safe.

Neil and I decided to go out with friends for like our first time. We have mainly gone to friends but this year I wanted something different. I wanted to go see a local band play at a bar.  The owner of this band is also my favourite Karaoke host. We have been hanging out for about three years now. Karaoke is one of my favourite things to do.

The past several months though I have had issues with mania, and needing to “not stimulate me” we have not been going to the shows. It is where I have met most of my friends, the rest of my friends are from past schools, and I have been adopted by Neils friends as well.  People seem to have an understanding of why I bail sometimes on Karaoke, I say I am going then don’t and that makes me feel guilty, but I am still loved. Lol.

I think the height of the night was when the singer of this band came over to me from the stage. We were standing and dancing right in front of the stage. It was getting close to the count down and everyone was getting their glasses of champagne to toast the night. Normally I would have had a red bull or a non-alcoholic beer but they ran out of both 😦  so I had a cup of water 😦 urgh.

The singer in this band has recently followed my steps in not drinking.

“You are the one who has inspired her to quit drinking. She had been in a bad lifestyle (musicians, artists,) and had gotten carried away with her drinking and the party lifestyle.” Neil told me.

 I first met J at a local bar where I had started doing Karaoke, it is my home base. I heard J sing and instantly fell for her. I have a bit of a girl crush. I thought she was well beyond the best singer I have heard. Turns out she was a professional singer, which I didn’t know at the time. She has this perfect voice. It’s my style, I don’t know who I can compare her to, she is unique.

We share smiles and she makes eye contact with me, she has specifically sung for me, dedicating songs to me, last night was no exception with the glances. Its the way she looks at me, the way she greets me, the hugs I get, and of course to top it off, her bending down from the stage in the middle of a song to share her Red Bull with me. That was top notch. 

It was a mighty fine night. My mania calmed down last night surprisingly, and it didn’t get triggered till we got home. I think I had been feeling rather anxious going to a bar I wasn’t familiar with. I told Neil I want to go back to that bar and next time I will dance.

This new year will be filled with adventures and really start planning our wedding.  I handpicked the date based on number sequence. Eight being my favourite number, looking on a calendar the eighth only showed up in August, which doubles my pleasure being 08/08. 2020 is also the same number repeat.

Our first choice was 2468. 2024, July 08. Pretty cool, maybe someone else will have that date.  

We decided to get married sooner.

All in all 2019 was decent, a bit difficult but one thing I know is I have to keep the mania from ever getting so bad.  I want lots of camping and I asked Neil if we could take a weekend away at a hotel somewhere (can’t camp all year). We both agreed. It is what I need to fully relax, I have to be away from home, basically away from my city. I have yet to create that in my life as it stands. I try but it is not quite the same as being away, Especially can’t recreate camping at home. That is impossible.

I am hoping to have a year of happiness, good health and an awesome wedding. I wish only the best for my family and friends and those of you on WordPress.

Happy New Year! What are your plans for 2020?

Categories: Uncategorized

Tagged as: anxiety bipolar entertainment journal karaoke mania new years non-alcoholic beer redbull sober

Christie F.

Welcome to my blog. I have been journal writing for years. I took a course in Creative writing and found I enjoy writing short stories and poetry. I write more when I am hypomanic or manic.
I went into Rehab for Alcohol Addictions and have been sober for fourteen years.
Shortly after I quit drinking I was diagnosed with Bipolar 2, I have since been diagnosed with Bipolar 1.
I enjoy talking about my story, for people to learn or relate. I try and have a healthy lifestyle and try to use my coping strategies. Life is just too boring without Bipolar, it is a blessing but yet sometimes a curse.
I am currently working on a book and dream of publishing one day.
I am so excited to have found Wordpress.
This is my new adventure.